Ten Stinky Stories Vol 1 Epub

Author by : Donald Rump
Languange : en
Publisher by : Donald Rump
Format Available : PDF, ePub, Mobi
Total Read : 51
Total Download : 820
File Size : 40,8 Mb
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Description : Celebrating the best of fart fiction, Donald Rump weaves together ten flatulent tales of love, betrayal, flesh-eating cannibals, and everyone's favorite green gas, that are sure to blow you away. Intended for mature (and not so mature) audiences. Over 100 pages (approximately 32,000 words). BOTTLING FARTS Could the greatest power… The path to riches beyond our wildest imagination… The key to reaching the highest level of spiritual awareness and happiness… …be obtained by bottling farts??? THE CHAPPED-ASS CRITIC Zack Pimpton's ass never felt worse, and it doesn't help that his doctor is a part time comedian. Unfortunately, Zack is quite the bastard himself and accidentally says the wrong thing that causes the mild-mannered doctor to snap. GOING DUTCH Barnabus Prim has reached the end of his rope. Drowning in debt and married to an obnoxious wife who can't stand the sight of him, he decides to do the unthinkable. But finding a way to the afterlife proves more difficult than he imagined. MARRIAGE STINKS Mackelroy Puggsley thought he'd heard everything until an odd man named Bilby Bloob shows up in the DMV lobby one morning. When Bilby demands a marriage license for his gassy wife, the old man puts his foot down. Sure, it's one thing to marry your high school sweetheart, but a fart? Who in the world marries farts? GASTROINTESTINAL BLUES Since leaving his posh position at the Department of Motor Vehicles, Mackelroy Puggsley thought he'd smelled the last psychotic fart that nearly killed him. But in his new role as a psychologist, he quickly realizes that the problem is more widespread than he thought. Will a crazed client and his two gassy brides prevent the old man from getting one last piece of nookie before he dies? Or will Mackelroy talk his way out of another hazardous situation and live to see another hair pie? THE WOULD BE ASTRONAUT Hank Larmspitz has a plan. Well, sort of. He's going to be the first man on the moon, dagnabbit, and he's going to do it without the aid of a space suit or even a space ship. THE $500 QUESTION Perkins Deadwood can't believe his ears. His twelve-year-old son just asked for a pet fart for Christmas. And not just any fart, a Spanish fart. Hay caramba! Can the used car salesman talk his son out of it? Or is this Christmas really going to stink? FINDING FLOOFY When a man falls head over heels for a murderous fart, he has difficulty coping with her mysterious departure. Was it something he said? Something he did? Was his penis too small? None of it makes any sense. "I will find you, my darling Floofy. Even if it's the last thing I do!" TILL DEATH DO US FART Helen Hubbard's fears have finally been confirmed. During brunch one morning in her favorite restaurant, her husband Gary confesses to cheating on her, and is ready to leave at a moment's notice. When she pries deeper into the matter, she discovers more about his mysterious lover Muffy than she cares to know. “So you’re leaving me for a fart???” Helen exclaimed. WEEKEND GETAWAY When Martin Dollop and Arthur Bodine set off for a romantic vacation in the islands, they have no idea what they're in for. Now rotting away in a Mexican jail cell, it appears that they've reached the end of their rope. Even the pinche guard won't do them the honor of putting a bullet in their heads, and offers each a shot of poison to end their suffering. Will the two lovebirds cash in on their free weekend getaway and make things right between them? Or will the doomed couple kill each other in the process? BONUS! Also includes the bonus story I Am Fart.


Diez Cuentos Apestosos Volumen 1 Epub

Author by : Donald Rump
Languange : en
Publisher by : Donald Rump
Format Available : PDF, ePub, Mobi
Total Read : 92
Total Download : 540
File Size : 42,5 Mb
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Description : Diez historias de amor, traición y ese gas verde favorito de todos en un inolvidable volumen. Para lectores adultos (maduros o no). Aproximadamente 30.000 palabras. EMBOTELLANDO PEDOS ¿Podría el poder más grande... El camino a la riqueza, más allá de nuestra imaginación más salvaje... La clave para alcanzar el más alto nivel de conciencia espiritual y la felicidad... ... Ser obtenido por pedos embotellado??? --Es nuestro secreto... --Vlad le dijo al niño pequeño. --Usa el poder con cuidado... EL CRITICO ENCULADO El culo de Zack Pimpton nunca ha estado peor, y el hecho de que el médico sea un comediante a tiempo parcial no ayuda. Por desgracia, Zack es bastante cabrón y dice lo que no debe, haciendo que el buen doctor se ponga furioso. A PUNTO DE REVENTAR Barnabus Prim ha llegado al final del camino. Ahogado en deudas y casado con una mujer odiosa que no puede ni verlo, decide hacer lo impensable. Pero encontrar el camino al más allá resulta mucho más difícil de lo que él había imaginado. EL MATRIMONIO APESTA Mackelroy Puggsley creía haberlo oído todo, hasta que un extraño hombre llamado Bilby Bloob se aparece en su vestíbulo una mañana. Cuando Bilby le pide un permiso de matrimonio para su gaseosa esposa, el viejo pone el freno. Sí, una cosa es casarte con tu novia de la secundaria, pero ¿con un pedo? ¿A quién se le puede ocurrir casarse con un pedo? --No me iré a ningún lado hasta que nos dé un permiso de matrimonio --insisitó Bilby. --¿Ah, sí? --Mackelroy se hizo sonar los nudillos. HASTA QUE EL GRAN PEDO NOS SEPARE Los temores de Helen Hubbard finalmente se han confirmado. Una mañana, durante el almuerzo en su restaurante favorito, su esposo Gary le confiesa que la ha estado engañando, y está listo para abandonarla en un instante. Cuando ella hurga en el asunto, descubre más de lo que quería saber sobre Muffy, la misteriosa amante de él. "¿¿¿Entonces me estás dejando por un pedo???", exclamó Helen. LA PREGUNTA DE 500 DÓLARES Perkins Deadwood no puede dar crédito a sus oídos. Su hijo de doce años acaba de pedirle para Navidad un pedo mascota. Y no cualquier pedo: un pedo español. ¡Ay, caramba! ¿Podrá disuadir a su hijo el vendedor de autos usados? ¿O será esta Navidad realmente apestosa? ESCAPADA DE FIN DE SEMANA Cuando Martin Dollop y Arthur Bodine parten para unas vacaciones románticas en las islas, no tienen idea de lo que les espera. Ahora se pudren en una celda de una cárcel mexicana y parece que han llegado al final del camino. Hasta el pinche guardia no les hará el honor de meterles una bala en la cabeza y les ofrece un poco de veneno para acabar con su sufrimiento. ¿Podrán los tórtolos concretar su escapada gratis de fin de semana y hacer las paces? ¿O acabarán los condenados matándose entre sí en el proceso? BUSCANDO A FLOOFY Cuando un hombre se enamora perdidamente de un pedo asesino, le resulta difícil aceptar su misteriosa partida. ¿Fue algo que dijo? ¿Algo que hizo? ¿Era su pene demasiado pequeño? Nada tiene sentido. "Te encontraré, mi querida Floofy. ¡Aunque sea lo último que haga!" EL ASPIRANTE A PEDONAUTA Hank Larmspitz tiene un plan. Bueno, más o menos. Va a ser el primer hombre en la luna, maldita sea, y va a hacerlo sin la ayuda de un traje espacial o incluso de una nave espacial. ¿Qué tiene en mente exactamente? Dan Dinkerleaf, un reportero local de KAAS-LD en Eureeka, quiere averiguarlo. Y cuando descubre las verdaderas intenciones de Hank, eso pone a prueba su paciencia. "¿En serio?", espeta. "¿No le parece que su teoría es... oh, no sé... implausible?" "Preste atención y tal vez aprenda algo." Hank hace sonar los nudillos y saca una ración de su marca favorita. PÚBLICO CAUTIVO Tres hombres, una secretaria rubia, un ascensor atascado y una serie de pedos horribles y letales. ¿Qué podría salir mal?


P Blico Cautivo Epub

Author by : Donald Rump
Languange : en
Publisher by : Donald Rump
Format Available : PDF, ePub, Mobi
Total Read : 30
Total Download : 586
File Size : 45,9 Mb
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Description : Tres hombres, una secretaria rubia, un ascensor atascado y una serie de pedos horribles y letales. ¿Qué podría salir mal? Pensado para públicos adultos (y no tanto). Aproximadamente 3600 palabras.


Captive Audience Epub

Author by : Donald Rump
Languange : en
Publisher by : Donald Rump
Format Available : PDF, ePub, Mobi
Total Read : 99
Total Download : 284
File Size : 43,9 Mb
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Description : Three men, one blonde secretary, a jammed up elevator, and a series of ghastly, deadly farts. What could possibly go wrong? Intended for mature (and not so mature) audiences. Approximately 3,600 words.


20 Common Questions About Farts Epub

Author by : Donald Rump
Languange : en
Publisher by : Donald Rump
Format Available : PDF, ePub, Mobi
Total Read : 29
Total Download : 848
File Size : 44,8 Mb
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Description : Think you know everything there is to know about mankind's favorite green gas? Well, Donald Rump has something in store for you! Inside, you'll finally get to the bottom of many age-old questions, including: - Where do farts come from? - Are farts people? - Do farts die? - Do all farts go to heaven? - What should I do if a zombie farts on me? - Does inhaling farts cause brain damage? - What if someone steals my farts? - Can farts be used to power my car? - I've run out of farts. Should I dial 911? - Should I join Fartaholics Anonymous? And many, many more! So what are you waiting for? Become a fart expert today! Approximately 11,500 words in all. Intended for readers 15 and up.


Stink And The World S Worst Super Stinky Sneakers Book 3

Author by : Megan McDonald
Languange : en
Publisher by : Candlewick Press
Format Available : PDF, ePub, Mobi
Total Read : 15
Total Download : 913
File Size : 55,6 Mb
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Description : A class visit to the Gross-Me-Out exhibit at the science museum inspires Stink Moody to create a variety of terrible smells to put on the sneakers he plans to enter in the World's Worst Super-Stinky Sneaker contest.


My Robot Farts Epub

Author by : Dingleberry Small
Languange : en
Publisher by : Dingleberry Small
Format Available : PDF, ePub, Mobi
Total Read : 56
Total Download : 789
File Size : 44,9 Mb
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Description : Daniel D. Drek has a problem. His new toy robot won’t stop farting, and even worse, he’s the one getting blamed. Can Danny boy put a cork in his robot’s farting habit once and for all, or will his parents ground him for all eternity? Intended for children 9-12. WARNING: This book is full of farts!


Word Power Grades 3 4 Enhanced Ebook

Author by : Eleanor J. Wier
Languange : en
Publisher by : Lorenz Educational Press
Format Available : PDF, ePub, Mobi
Total Read : 71
Total Download : 823
File Size : 46,7 Mb
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Description : Each book in the Word Power series provides 22 activities which introduce more than 60 challenging new words chosen from popular literature at the designated level. This mode of selection expands the conventional basal vocabularies and ensures the usefulness of words learned. Three two-page reviews reinforce learning. Activity pages introduce new words in context. Reinforcement is provided in student activities matching words with their meanings, aphabetizing words, matching words with their antonyms, and completing puzzles. All lessons are teacher-created. The teaching guide includes a list of source books for each level.


Inspector Flytrap Book 1

Author by : Tom Angleberger
Languange : en
Publisher by : Triangle Interactive, Inc.
Format Available : PDF, ePub, Mobi
Total Read : 32
Total Download : 545
File Size : 45,5 Mb
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Description : Read Along or Enhanced eBook: From husband-and-wife team Tom Angleberger, creator of the New York Times bestselling Origami Yoda series, and Cece Bell, author/illustrator of the Newbery Honor graphic novel El Deafo, comes the start to a funny and clever illustrated chapter-book series about a mystery-solving Venus flytrap. With easy-to-read language and illustrations on almost every page, this early-chapter-book series is a must for beginning readers. Inspector Flytrap in the Da Vinci Cold introduces kids to the humorous and wacky world of Inspector Flytrap’s Detective Agency, home to the world-renowned solver of BIG DEAL mysteries. The plant detective works tirelessly with his assistant Nina the Goat on his community’s unsolved cases. There’s no case too big, but there are definitely cases too small for this endearingly self-important plant detective. Celebrating the disabled yet enabled, the character of Inspector Flytrap is wheeled everywhere (on a skateboard, of course) by his goat sidekick as this mystery-solving duo works on cases such as “The Big Deal Mystery of the Stinky Cookies” and “The Big Deal Mystery of the Missing Rose.” On his first caper, Inspector Flytrap heads to the Art Museum’s Secret Lab to discover what important message lies in a mysterious glob on a recently discovered Da Vinci flower painting. The ingenious solution: Da Vinci was allergic to flowers, and the glob is, er, evidence of that ancient sneeze. Combining wacky humor and a silly cast of characters with adventure, friendship, and mystery, the powerhouse team of Tom Angleberger and Cece Bell have created a uniquely engaging series that is perfect for newly independent readers and fans of Ricky Ricotta, Captain Underpants, and the Galaxy Zack series. Also included in these books are some graphic novel–style pages that will attract reluctant readers.


I Stink

Author by : Kate McMullan
Languange : en
Publisher by : Joanna Cotler Books
Format Available : PDF, ePub, Mobi
Total Read : 25
Total Download : 343
File Size : 53,5 Mb
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Description : A big city garbage truck makes its nighttime rounds, consuming everything from apple cores and banana peels to leftover ziti with zucchini. 35,000 first printing.