Zeus Grants Stupid Wishes

Zeus Grants Stupid Wishes
Author: Cory O'Brien
Publsiher: Penguin
Total Pages: 304
Release: 2013-03-05
ISBN: 1101619678
Category: Humor
Language: EN, FR, DE, ES & NL

Zeus Grants Stupid Wishes Book Excerpt:

Get this: Cronus liked to eat babies. Narcissus probably should have just learned to masturbate. Odin got construction discounts with bestiality. Isis had bad taste in jewelry. Ganesh was the very definition of an unplanned pregnancy. And Abraham was totally cool about stabbing his kid in the face. All our lives, we’ve been fed watered-down, PC versions of the classic myths. In reality, mythology is more screwed up than a schizophrenic shaman doing hits of unidentified…wait, it all makes sense now. In Zeus Grants Stupid Wishes, Cory O’Brien, creator of Myths RETOLD!, sets the stories straight. These are rude, crude, totally sacred texts told the way they were meant to be told: loudly, and with lots of four-letter words. Skeptical? Here are a few more gems to consider: • Zeus once stuffed an unborn fetus inside his thigh to save its life after he exploded its mother by being too good in bed. • The entire Egyptian universe was saved because Sekhmet just got too hammered to keep murdering everyone. • The Hindu universe is run by a married couple who only stop murdering in order to throw sweet dance parties…on the corpses of their enemies. • The Norse goddess Freyja once consented to a four-dwarf gangbang in exchange for one shiny necklace. And there’s more dysfunctional goodness where that came from.

George Washington Is Cash Money

George Washington Is Cash Money
Author: Cory O'Brien
Publsiher: Penguin
Total Pages: 224
Release: 2015-05-12
ISBN: 0698186702
Category: Humor
Language: EN, FR, DE, ES & NL

George Washington Is Cash Money Book Excerpt:

PREPARE TO BE BEAKED BY THE MAJESTIC EAGLE OF HISTORY Most of us are familiar with the greatest hits and legendary heroes of US history. In George Washington Is Cash Money, Cory O’Brien, author of Zeus Grants Stupid Wishes, does away with the pomp and circumstance and calls America’s history what it is: one long, violent soap opera. In his signature clever, crude, and cuss-ridden style, O’Brien reminds us that: · Teddy Roosevelt stopped bullets with his manly chest · Harriet Tubman avoided danger by having prophetic seizures. · Joseph Smith invented Mormonism by staring into a hat full of rocks. · Billy the Kid was finally defeated by the smell of fresh bacon. And there’s plenty more Star Spangled stupidity where that came from.

A Concordance to the Poems of Robert Browning

A Concordance to the Poems of Robert Browning
Author: Leslie Nathan Broughton,Benjamin Franklin Stelter
Publsiher: Unknown
Total Pages: 135
Release: 1925
ISBN: 1928374650XXX
Category: Electronic Book
Language: EN, FR, DE, ES & NL

A Concordance to the Poems of Robert Browning Book Excerpt: